Friday Reflection #7: Beaches and Limbo
It's been a humanizing week...
Welcome to Friday Reflections! A weekly newsletter where I usually share 3 thoughts and things I loved and learned from the week, but this week’s gone a little differently…
Hey there, and Happy Friday!
How was your week? Mine was a roller coaster.
I’m gonna be honest, I can’t even really formulate a true newsletter, but wanna stay consistent with something.
So remember last week’s Friday Reflection when I said I was writing it on a Wednesday because I was going on a cruise that Friday?
Well, I went on the cruise, but not before losing my grandpa Thursday night.
I dunno why I was so vague about who I was talking about in my last Reflection, but yeah, it was grandpa, and he passed away.
I’m super grateful that I was able to talk to him and visit him around an hour before he passed. I’m glad I was able to be there for my family too.
Then 12 hours later I was boarding the ship.
Wild times.
We’re gonna finish collecting things we need for the funeral by Monday, everyone is consistently checking in on grandma, and the funeral is in a little over a week.
After this past week, I can confidently say not every week is meant to be some deep reflection that needs to be absorbed, or shared.
Sometimes a week (or any season of life) is just a life that’s being lived and nothing profound can come from it.
This past week forced me into that.
I didn’t have internet access on the ship at all. Not even offline drafting on Google Docs. So I was forced to sit with the buzz of everyone around me in the ship’s pizza shop while I illogically teared up over my free slice because I regretted not telling grandpa I loved him.
Anyway, I finished writing this and came back to this point to say that I indeed do have three thoughts/things to share.
They may not be the most profound, but they’re mine and I love them for adding a marker of moments and memories from my life.
Thing One: Food Inheritance
Something else I noticed while I was on the ship was how dang delicious those cake cones and ice cream were!
There’s a spot or two on the ship called “Sprinkles” where a man serves you vanilla, chocolate, or swirl ice cream from a typical metal soft serve machine, in a cake cone from a package.
I’m pretty sure it was the equivalent of a $1.50 cone at McDonald’s, but it just hits different on a sunny and hot ship.
But something else that came to mind was how much my mom loved those vanilla ice cream cones at McDonald’s. She ordered them so often, that I ended up downloading the McDonald’s app and can now get a free Big Mac with the points I racked up from mainly ice cream and fry orders.
I remember a lot of food memories and idiosyncrasies about my mom; I really should write them all down someday soon.
But yeah, I never liked cake cones. If I got a cone, it would be a chocolate-dipped waffled cone. But since the cruise I’ve found myself actually enjoying them.
Just like mom.
Something else I realized I started acquiring more of a taste for were elephant ears1 over funnel cakes. Mom, dad, grandma, and grandpa were always elephant ear people, while I usually ate funnel cakes, and my brother would grab one of each.
Over the past year or two while mom was still alive to witness it earth-side, I’d moved to the elephant ear side (because they’re pretty easy to replicate at home! A good elephant ear? Not so much).
My vanilla cake cone discovery reminded me of Vannessa’s piece about the specific way she wanted diet coke, and how it was exactly how her late father made his:
An endearing read; so maybe I did have something to share after all, huh?
Granted, this is all coming to me within like an hour of my posting time of 12pm EST so this’ll be a little late, but it’s worth it.
I like what’s coming to me more than what I was forcing out just last night in the name of consistency.
Thing Two: Possible Prep for a Social Media Return
I’ve been casually and vaguely been thinking about getting back on Instagram in a few months… maybe.
If I return to the ‘gram, I’m doing so with my head on my shoulders, digital boundaries in place, intentions set, and posts batched for at least 3 weeks in advance.
I will be ready… if I return.
But while I was getting ready to shower this morning, I was watching another Jenn Im video (you know, the chick who has a whole “alone” video I based my last whole personal essay around?)
This one was about the dark side of social media. It was a refreshing take on what we’re used to hearing about the dark sides of social media. A little more personalized nuance. But in the entire video, these words from her stuck on the most to me:
The thing is, we are multifacted. There’s so many complexities and nuances within us, so let’s please explore that. Tap into your curisotiy and make that your superpower. Capture any thoughts, ideas, feelings, and moments and ask yourself: What moved me? How can this help someone? And don’t be afraid to take your time. You know, really simmer on it. Because depth takes time and patience. And honestly, in this digital world that’s rapidly becoming this dumpster filled with ill-prepared, processed, microwaved content… be that warm, nourishing, homemade meal straight from the oven that’s perfectly seasoned and mariented. Because that’s what humans crave. That’s what we fucking need.
So I uh… I’m keeping this in mind for whenever/if I return.
I had started taking quotes from my Substack posts to repost on IG right before I left and it was working out fairly nicely!
So we’ll see. Life can lead us anywhere, right?
Thing Three: 1 Second Everyday App Shoutout
I would’ve have found this app if it wasn’t for Jenna's
podcast where she mentioned it.It’s an app that lets you document one project, with 1-1.5 second clips per day for free (much more time, clips, projects, and more if you pay), and it’s been really nice and jarring to look back at this year so far.
It’s also keeping me intentional of capturing small moments of my day.
But when I watch back what I have so far, all I’ve traveled this year. Seeing my grandpa moving, laughing… then being rolled away, then to immediately see me on a ship with a non-alcoholic pina colada… Wow.
It’s the best, and easiest way to document snippets of your life to look back on. I still have a personal desire to find my journaling footing, but even if I do. I highly recommend this app.
And speaking of documenting, I have some photos to share from my trip, and one I found of my mom and grandpa (who are reunited!) while we were searching for pics for the funeral:
Keep living your life, finding your groove, and nourishing yourself.
And I’ll see you next week. :)
I think elephant ears have different names in different places, but it’s a fried piece of dough that’s both chewy and crunchy (crispy, in its thinnest pieces) and buttered up, then covered in cinnamon sugar. Delicious!