Being able to walk away and not escalate situations? Or being so “enlightened” that you genuinely no longer take their behavior toward you personally, therefore no longer reacting to it?
I JUST had an exchange with a seriously unhinged woman on Substack who ATTACKED me like an ALLEY DOG after I delivered an evidence-based list of bad news about a famous guy (alive, not dead) who turned out to be one of her personal heroes.
If you're in the 'spiritual' community you know that we're guided to understand upsets/triggers as our 'greatest gifts'. That is, to see OUR SHADOW in a situation, and work to clear that 'density'. It's not a one-off. It's grinding, daily work.
So what made me stronger? Hmmm...stronger. I guess you're made stronger when you realize it was about them, and not you. And that 'energy work' is important when dealing with unhinged rage. Move that energy AWAY. Don't stay energetically connected. I think we grow our energy system when we acknowledge and practice it. Step out of toxic energy loops if possible.
I also grew stronger by connecting that incident to another Substack woman's discussion about 'culture idols' and 'cancel culture'. The crazy Substacker was triggered by the idea that her hero wasn't perfect. So she sought to 'cancel' ME, the messenger, instead of engaging in discussion. There, I see how toppling statues and cancelling people is exactly the opposite of what humans need to do, which is to investigate and discuss. Toppling, censoring, cancelling just grows the energy.
Hard to be human, eh?! Enjoy the rest of your weeked, Cierra!
Oooh I like this take! There’s some comfort of being mindful of how others are processing what’s happening, but ALWAYS try to disconnect and distance yourself.
I’m trying to remember what made me ask this... I think I had a disagreement with my mom and wondered which was considered “stronger”.... cause you’re taught to walk away so you won’t react, which is good!
And I also feel like there’s a power and empowering feeling when you genuinely hear them and KNOW it’s not something you take personally.
To have that awareness is SO great and freeing!
When I was reading your reply, that was he first thing I thought! She has a connection to that person that put her on the DE 👏🏽 FENSE 👏🏽
The hardest thing is our own ego. We want to 'win'. We might be right or wrong, but we need to WIN.
But win what? And that's the growth; and what makes us stronger: letting go of a fight when a fight is actually worthless. Realizing that we win nothing by locking horns with a stranger over nothing.
VERY DIFFICULT. You want to 'win', but you realize that with each exchange you're lowering yourself further to their level. It takes reining in your own ego to quit.
And clashing with family (your mom) has its own energy, because we're deeply tied to family members. You need to simultaneously set boundaries, hold firm positions, and not give up your power WHILE not getting drawn into dynamics and psyches.
Maybe strength is realizing that this WORK to grow never ends? The work of being human!
SO true. I think there's a lot of power in getting to a place where you realize that the aregument or fight isn't worth fighting about because there's nothing to prove to anyone when YOU'RE secure with who you are, ya know?
But boy is it work!
I know a lot of people who aren't aware of it, so they try to "win" and I try explaining that it's not personal or important if THEY know the truth, but that egooo really does grow!
Learning even that the ego can be something to work with would be a positive change.
And also agree! Working on the mom thing. Usually I do good but when the bear is poked enough... BOOM! Ahahaha!
I JUST had an exchange with a seriously unhinged woman on Substack who ATTACKED me like an ALLEY DOG after I delivered an evidence-based list of bad news about a famous guy (alive, not dead) who turned out to be one of her personal heroes.
If you're in the 'spiritual' community you know that we're guided to understand upsets/triggers as our 'greatest gifts'. That is, to see OUR SHADOW in a situation, and work to clear that 'density'. It's not a one-off. It's grinding, daily work.
So what made me stronger? Hmmm...stronger. I guess you're made stronger when you realize it was about them, and not you. And that 'energy work' is important when dealing with unhinged rage. Move that energy AWAY. Don't stay energetically connected. I think we grow our energy system when we acknowledge and practice it. Step out of toxic energy loops if possible.
I also grew stronger by connecting that incident to another Substack woman's discussion about 'culture idols' and 'cancel culture'. The crazy Substacker was triggered by the idea that her hero wasn't perfect. So she sought to 'cancel' ME, the messenger, instead of engaging in discussion. There, I see how toppling statues and cancelling people is exactly the opposite of what humans need to do, which is to investigate and discuss. Toppling, censoring, cancelling just grows the energy.
Hard to be human, eh?! Enjoy the rest of your weeked, Cierra!
Oooh I like this take! There’s some comfort of being mindful of how others are processing what’s happening, but ALWAYS try to disconnect and distance yourself.
I’m trying to remember what made me ask this... I think I had a disagreement with my mom and wondered which was considered “stronger”.... cause you’re taught to walk away so you won’t react, which is good!
And I also feel like there’s a power and empowering feeling when you genuinely hear them and KNOW it’s not something you take personally.
To have that awareness is SO great and freeing!
When I was reading your reply, that was he first thing I thought! She has a connection to that person that put her on the DE 👏🏽 FENSE 👏🏽
It’s all so wild!
The hardest thing is our own ego. We want to 'win'. We might be right or wrong, but we need to WIN.
But win what? And that's the growth; and what makes us stronger: letting go of a fight when a fight is actually worthless. Realizing that we win nothing by locking horns with a stranger over nothing.
VERY DIFFICULT. You want to 'win', but you realize that with each exchange you're lowering yourself further to their level. It takes reining in your own ego to quit.
And clashing with family (your mom) has its own energy, because we're deeply tied to family members. You need to simultaneously set boundaries, hold firm positions, and not give up your power WHILE not getting drawn into dynamics and psyches.
Maybe strength is realizing that this WORK to grow never ends? The work of being human!
SO true. I think there's a lot of power in getting to a place where you realize that the aregument or fight isn't worth fighting about because there's nothing to prove to anyone when YOU'RE secure with who you are, ya know?
But boy is it work!
I know a lot of people who aren't aware of it, so they try to "win" and I try explaining that it's not personal or important if THEY know the truth, but that egooo really does grow!
Learning even that the ego can be something to work with would be a positive change.
And also agree! Working on the mom thing. Usually I do good but when the bear is poked enough... BOOM! Ahahaha!
All true.